Parenting Styles of African Parents

The same adults who are supposed to support, guide, or mentor a child are speaking down on them. What do you believe will happen?

Parents are one of the most influential people in a child’s life; if they constantly say things that diminish the child’s self-esteem, he or she will grow up believing they are undeserving of love; they will hide and crawl through life until the end of their life unless that deeply ingrained belief can be removed and replaced with more positive ones.

Our subconscious minds hold so much programming about our lives, it’s like a database of all our human data, we are only as smart as what we know, we can only act through life based on our internalized information, rewriting the human mind takes more than just some positive thinking, it’s always about tracing it to the root and replacing the negativity with more life empowering inflections

Artificial intelligence is only as good as the database of information provided to it; similarly, we as humans behave and speak in life depending on our degree of knowledge; you can’t offer what you don’t have, and we can’t be smarter than the level of conscious training we have gotten.

Yesterday, I mentioned how poverty can be passed down from parents to children, just as abusive behavior can be passed down from parents to children, some ladies in abusive homes are usually a result of having an abusive father or mother, we can only attract more of what we are, when pain is so great it may become the only life we know, peace and serenity appear foreign, for a variety of reasons most people are incapable of love, they are unused to receiving love, when someone shows them so much affe

A normal African parent rarely displays or says how much they love their children, some fathers cannot even tell their child I love you, it appears out of place, some children are afraid of hugging their father or mother, it looks strange, who are we to blame? We act as a result of what we have been taught, not because the apple has fallen from the tree. The first I love you a child hears should not come from an outsider; it should be part of our parental guidance; we must continually assure our children that they are loved. When parents are overly strict, it fosters mistrust; the youngster lacks confidence in disclosing personal information and would prefer respond with “fine” when asked for additional personal information.

Some parents rarely lavish praise and appreciation on their children, and comparing their child to other children of friends or relatives might lower the child’s self-esteem. When such a child hears these remarks from strangers, it seems like they have just inherited the earth, and this, in turn, can be used to exploit the child, since when criticism outweighs adulations, it continually sows a seed of negativity in a child’s way of life.

We are naturally social animals, we always want to love and be loved, we always want to be needed and also need other people, when this is absent, we seek this validation elsewhere, and a child who has been misguided by a poor parenting-style may be fed love from a wrong source, which in turn completely shatters their self-image, if the child has been misguided by a poor parenting-style


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